NFL Fallen and Cant Get Up

NFL Fallen and Cant Get Up by Utter-Fantasy Football Writer & Illustrator Samantha Holt


Murphy’s Law: If something can go wrong, then it will, and it has…especially in Cleveland!

The Medical Alert Badges were sounded off all over the NFL. This should be the subtitle to the NFL Week 2. After what already felt like a large amount of injuries last week, we saw a slew of them this week. I share this pain with all of you. This season I made the brilliant decision to join 8 fantasy leagues. I can say with certainty I have at least one of the following injuries on each of my teams. 3 in one league. If the early week 1 panic did not reach you, this new wave has likely hit you. I will not cover every “questionable” player, as the majority of those will play this week. AJ Green is marked questionable but he’s fine, he missed practice because his wife is having a baby so congrats to the Green family! Back to serious injuries, I sincerely hope week 3 is a healthier one. Starting from “down for the season” to “more minor injuries”, let’s dive on in.

Medical Alert

Ameer Abdullah RB DET:
Has been placed on IR with a foot injury that will require surgery. Dwayne Washington is potentially moving into the RB1 slot in Detroit. Theo Riddick is unlikely to be the every down back, but more likely to be a redzone vulture and 3rd down back. Between the two, pick up Washington, likely still available in your league.

Danny Woodhead RB :
So unfortunate to see Woodhead out for the year. Melvin Gordon moves up to RB1 and RB Kenneth Farrow worth a flyer in deep leagues only.

Adrian Peterson RB MINN:
AP has elected to have surgery on his torn meniscus.
The Vikings have signed Ronnie Hillman as of this week to fill in the backfield during AP’s absence. It will take a few weeks for him to gain momentum, but he will be the guy who eventually takes on the majority of the workload. We know this based on the Vikings lack of confidence that the combo of Asiata and McKinnon would be enough to get them through the season. First pick: Ronnie Hillman Second Pick: Matt Asiata (deep leagues only)

Doug Martin RB TB:
Out 3 weeks with a hamstring injury. Tampa Bay has a bye in week 6, this gives Martin 4 weeks to get back and he’ll need it as we all know hamstring injuries are particularly difficult to comeback from. They’re tough simply because players never get to fully test the muscle until they’re making an explosive move. This is why these injuries tend to linger, players comeback too soon and re-aggravate the injury simply because they felt fine walking. Hopefully Martin has a speedy recovery. Until he returns Charles Sims will be taking the majority of the work with Jacquizz Rodgers filling in behind him. I don’t expect much from Rodgers, he’s more of a deep league flag to watch. If you’re a Martin owner and your options are slim at replacements, pick up Sims.

Donte Mocrief WR IND:
Moncrief has a fractured scapula and will be out 4 to 6 weeks. He will not be having surgery, just rest and rehab. In the mean time Hilton owners who are normally frustrated by the imbalance of the two sharing targets, will see a bump in targets was Luck will be heavily relying on him. Also receiving a bump in targets will be WR Phillip Dorsett. He would be an interesting play in deep league PPR formats. Bump up the IND TEs.

Josh McCown QB CLEV:
CLEV QB Josh McCown apparently suffered a broken left collarbone in Week 2. ( an injury that is likely to have him out  two months. Tony Romo missed nine weeks with a similar injury last season)

Corey Coleman WR CLEV:
Breaking news today, Corey Coleman broke his hand in practice.. I’m positive he didn’t do this on purpose just to make this article longer.. but who knows. Out 4-6 weeks. Seriously though?! These injuries need to stop! I just replaced Brandon Marshall in my line up with you! Uhggg… Terrelle Pryor will see more targets with Coleman inevitably sitting out this weekend. Lets face it he can’t catch with one hand wrapped up.

Jay Cutler QB CHI:
Torn ligament in his thumb, as of right now he will not be having surgery. If they’re not rushing him into the operating room I think it’s safe to say they do not think the injury is bad enough that he’ll be out longer than a couple weeks. I think this knocks down Alshon Jeffery just slightly in rankings, but he’s the #1 receiver so his numbers should not take a major hit.

Jonathan Stewart RB CAR:
Hamstring. Damn it guys can you just stretch before you play? I think all football players should be required to do yoga atlas twice a week just to stretch out those hamstrings. Come on. Anyways, Stewart will be out anywhere from 2 to 4 weeks. Carolina’s bye is in week 7, so I would not be surprised to see Carolina wait to bring Stewart back until after the bye. In the mean time Fozzy Whitaker bumps up in rankings as next in line to receive the majority of carries. Cameron Artis-Payne is worth a stash as well, but the job is Whitaker’s for now.

Rashad Jennings RB NYG:
Jennings left Sunday’s game in a hard cast around his left wrist and thumb. Not a good look. He was however a limited participant in practice. Hopefully that’s a positive sign. Shane Vereen likely to see more carries if Jennings stays questionable up until Sunday.

Brandon Marshall WR NYJ:
When Marshall went down and grabbed at that knee it looked bad. My first thought was damn the ACL being so sensitive. But for now it appears Marshall did not tear anything but he didn’t practice Wednesday. He will be a game time decision Sunday. Decker also sat out in practice with a shoulder injury though he has said he will play this weekend. I think the rest is out of an abundance of caution due to Marshall’s injury. The guy to pick up here is WR Quincy Enunwa.

Devante Parker WR MIA:
Hamstring.. I’m serious about these guys taking yoga. Parker was a limited participant in practice today, so he shouldn’t miss time this weekend. However, I’m nervous because a small hammy injury can get worse quick without proper rehab. Kenny Stills would be the streaming option behind Parker should he miss anytime.

Alshon Jeffery WR CHI:
Was a limited participant in practice due to knee injury. Oh how I hope this does not get worse. Jeffery has been plagued with injuries throughout his career and fantasy owners are all to familiar with it. Let’s hope this really isn’t serious. For goodness sake we can’t lose any more!!

(Likely more injuries since posting this article…BUT don’t tell me. I can’t take any more bad news….as my fantasy football teams have fallen and can barely get up….as it is.)

Sam Holt

Follow Sam’s 2016 quest for another Dynasty Fantasy Football championships on twitter @SamanthaRHolt

Also by Utter-Fantasy Writer & Illustrator Samantha Holt…”This is How We Dynasty Football”

and Fantasy Stock Drops From 2016 Draft by Utter-Fantasy Writer & Illustrator Samantha Holt

This is How We Dynasty Football

This is How We Dynasty Football by Utter-Fantasy Writer & Illustrator Samantha Holt


Active in Fantasy Football for 6 years, received 1st Championship in 2015 Season. Token woman of the Sunday Funday League.


Six tables are set facing a large white board. Laptops are in place alongside binders filled with copious notes. The room is a buzz with chatter. Shifty glances are exchanged. Monitors with skype callers begin to light, it’s almost time. Owners move to their seats, last minute beers and drinks are made. It’s time, for the Rookie Draft, the first Owner is on the clock. He fields offers for his pick, bidding wars are waged, the decision is made, Amari Cooper is taken first overall in the 2015 Sunday Funday League Rookie Draft.

Sounds a bit intense? Well that’s because it is my friends, if you’re reading this you understand that Fantasy Football is not merely a hobby, it’s a lifestyle. I believe there is no better example of this than in my Dynasty League. That’s a pretty biased statement, but fuck it, it’s my opinion.

The Beginning

Our inaugural season began in 2013, and our Commissioner is the glue that brought us all together. All members had multiple years of experience prior to joining, no newbies, you needed to know your shit to be invited. It was important when this began that if you were to be an owner in this League, you needed to be an active owner. No Tacos in this league (but there are at least 2 Ruxin’s and a definitive Andre). We wanted our league to resemble what real owners deal with in managing a team. We are an Auction, 8 keeper, IDP league; with the ability to trade Free Agency Cash and Rookie Draft Picks. We have a cap for keeper salary going into our auction draft, and a Salary Cap to begin the season. We now also have an in season salary cap. Oh and each player drafted has a set contract you can keep them at their salary for before you have to extend their contract by increasing their salary. Does that sound like a lot? You still following me?

The Details

Each Season begins with our Annual League Rules Meeting that rolls into our Rookie Draft. The Rules Meeting starts out simply enough. This is where we vote on changing any current rules or adding new ones. Straight forward no bullshit, and you can’t say you weren’t aware of a change because we have a binder with a meeting agenda and Google drive documents of the Rules and Changes made during the meetings. To the Rookie Draft! It obviously takes place sometime after the NFL Draft, depending on coordinating the schedules of 12 Owners. There are 3 rounds in the Draft and each owner has a draft pick. Top 6 picks are picked at random amongst teams with worst records from the previous season. What makes the Draft more fun however is that we’re allowed to trade our picks. So goes the bidding war for those who ended up with multiple picks. Rookies are valuable because they’re drafted at set low salaries with 3 year contracts (ex: 1st Round: $5, 2nd Round: $3, 3rd Round $1).

Draft Day

Auction draft is held at a location decided on by the winner of the previous year. Last year it was held at the Palazzo in Las Vegas, in Lagasse’s Stadium. If you want to do a draft party in Vegas that’s the place to go. They have package deals where you can have a private suite with multiple TVs pool table and waiters that constantly and quickly bring drinks and great food. It was a sweet draft, needless to say we were all destroyed afterwards, worth it. We have a max of 8 keepers and their salaries combined must be $200 or less. Max Salary to start the season is $300. This may seem high, but keep in mind this fantasy football league is based on the idea that this is a marathon not a sprint. WE can make moves that will benefit over several years or make moves for the immediate. We each strategize our own ways but it’s a system designed to fit the Owner’s needs.


The number one thing we get the most positive feedback from is that fact that we hold an Awards Ceremony at the end of every season. Our Commissioner painstakingly puts together the Awards packet with nominees for each category and each owner submits their votes to the Commissioner for counting. He then has awards made with the category and winners names engraved. The ceremony itself has written monologues for the host, speeches for the presenters, songs written & recorded for the winning teams to walk up to, friends are invited to the exclusive guest list, and there are video interviews for the nominees of the “big award” of the night, Team of the Year. The answer to your next question is: Yes, we do have too much time on our hands and spend a lot of money on something that is purely for fun. Why? Because it’s fun and we’re awesome, what better reason do you need?! The ceremony is a red carpet affair. We literally bought our own red carpet and had a back drop made (with logos I designed) for photos with the photographer we hired for the event. *insert gif of Lil’ Jon throwing money here*

Dynasty Leagues are complicated. Ours is no exception. However, if we didn’t have this league set up the way we do, we wouldn’t be able to reap all the benefits that fantasy football has to offer. This has turned the game into a year round sport for us. So while some of you are patiently waiting for next season to get close enough to mock draft efficiently. I’m watching the Combine and reading player stats to prep for the rookie draft. #Boom.

Samantha Holt

Follow Sam’s 2016 quest for another Dynasty Fantasy Football championships on twitter @SamanthaRHolt